Hooked on a Feeling…

Oh dating, why do you have to be so complicated?!  I have a friend who currently has gone on a few dates with a guy who has literally done everything right.  He pays, he’s respectful, he makes his intentions known, and he is mature enough and looking for something serious–just what she could ask for.  The only problem is, she isn’t sexually attracted to him.  To make things more complicated she recently met and hooked up with a guy she is very sexually attracted to but who is all wrong for her to date.  He is much younger, has never really been in an adult relationship, and likely will not date her.  His friend is a player and he likely will play my friend too but she still wants to give things a try.  What is it with us women that we get ourselves into these situations? Continue reading

The Dating Game

We’ve all been there.  Sitting by the phone waiting for a call, or as I suppose these days, a text.  Hoping for some inkling from our new beau that he cares or is thinking of us.  Dating can be fun but it is also very nerve wracking and not fit for the impatient.  Sure it is entertaining to go out with different people, have a nice meal and some good conversations, and get to know people to see if there is a connection, but it gets old fast.  What’s not so enjoyable about the dating world, however, is when you finally meet someone you like and there is all that time spent waiting.  Waiting for the phone to ring, for a text to come, to find out if you are exclusive, for sex, for the discovery of the unknown about each other.  It is why I prefer relationships to dating, the comfort level that you attain when with someone after a longer period of time is what I crave, not the anxiety riddled world of fear and rejection that is dating. Continue reading

Topics in Dating

So I’ve been scouring the internet on my downtime at work in hopes of finding some salacious topic to pique my readers’ interests and actually am somewhat surprised and dissappointed at what comes up when I Google dating.  I placed topics in dating into Google, hoping there would be a list of topics I could write about–things that are of interest to the masses regarding dating.  Instead I find a myriad of articles pertaining to what to discuss and not discuss on a first date.  I probe these articles, now curious as to what the self-help gurus of the web have to say about what’s acceptable and unacceptable fodder for an initial date.  The findings are actually quite interesting. Continue reading

Casual Sex Part Deux

I feel like I’ve written about this before but it’s a topic that comes to my mind again–whether or not sex really can be casual.  I have always been notorious for falling for guys that I sleep with regardless of the quality of the sex, length of time knowing the person, and my attraction to the person.  I definitely would not say I fall in love–that is reserved for special circumstances but I tend to become enamored with the person and want more than just that physical contact–I want hearts and flowers as EL James would say.  I know that sex and love and relationships are all separate entities, especially for guys but am I so crazy for wanting something more than a hook up?  I think my unconscious decision to want more with these men stems from some underlying sense of guilt I have for sleeping with a guy who hasn’t wined and dined me much or at all yet.  It is this guilt that I am annoyed with.  I shouldn’t feel ashamed of engaging in consensual safe sex but for some reason I do.  Continue reading

The Amorous Commit-a-Phobe

While on a recent lunch date with my bff and her sister, I stumbled into an interesting conversation that both surprised and enlightened me.  This friend was telling us a funny old story that involved a boy whom was in love with her but wasn’t interested in dating her or in a relationship.  It was not the humorous tale involving inebriation and vomiting that shocked me but rather the revelation that there is someone else out there who experienced this type of dater–or non-dater rather–The Amorous Commit-a-phobe.  I know that seems like an oxymoron, but yet they do exist and I finally realize that perhaps my crazy dating life in which I feel so scattered and alone is not so uncommon after all. Continue reading

Has Marriage Run It’s Course?

We read it in the tabloids every day…”Insert Celebrity Couple Here Calls it Quits.”  Demi and Ashton, Peter Facinelli and Jennie Garth, David Arquette and Courtney Cox–even the couples you think will last split up at some point.  Sure, you can say that these are celebrities and they do not represent the real world but in reality, they do.  My parents are divorced.  Many of my friend’s parents are divorced.  In fact, while nationally the marriage rate is 6.8 per 1000, the divorce rate is 3.4 per 1000 which begs the question–has marriage run it’s course? Continue reading

Welcome Back-Can You Really Convert to Just Friends

Hello all.  I’m sure for those you who did read my blog regularly you were wondering where I’ve gone.  Well a few big changes have happened in my life, the main one being that I got a new job.  I no longer sit in a private office with enough spare time to work on my blog, I sit in a surprisingly nice cubicle surrounded by the execs and VPs…so I can’ t typically work on personal projects.  However, as I miss writing in this daily I will try to find the time each day to at least do one post and keep Sexiquette going.  After all, I do drive around with a Sexiquette sticker on my bumper so I can’t really let down all the new onlookers driven to the site by my promotions.  Plus, I can’t let down my loyal fans. Continue reading

The Sneak Up Effect of Love

So earlier this week I was out with some friends at a bar trying to have a good time.  I met a guy who wasn’t really my type and whom I really had no interest in but I allowed him to buy me drinks.  After all, this is what I’m supposed to be doing to get over a broken  heart, right?  Well the night wound up being a disaster when the guy thought buying drinks equaled free reign of his hands on my body.  I tried to be polite but after a while it really started to irk me.  By the end of the night I left in tears not just because of the groping jerk but because out of the blue I was struck with the sadness of heartache and it’s been almost a month since I was dumped. Continue reading

Rejection, A Sad State of Affairs

So recently I hooked up with a guy to try to get over my ex.  I know, not my most brilliant idea but we all do stupid things when we are hurting.  Well this guy and I hooked up a few times and had made tentatively plans to actually go out on a date.  I wasn’t really that into him but I needed to try to move on from the guy I was dating and I thought this could be a fun distraction.  Now, today I got news that he will be coming to the bar we’ve been hanging out at each Friday with a new girl.  I did not hear this from him, I heard it from a friend but despite not even having feelings for him I find myself with tears welling up in my eyes.  It’s not that HE dumped me, but that he DUMPED me. Continue reading

Guys Do It So I’m Gonna Do It Better: The Hookup

We’ve all done it or been a victim of it, the casual hookup.  You meet a guy or girl at a bar, go back to their place or bring them back to yours, and you have sex.  Sometimes it’s amazing, usually it’s awkward or one person is too drunk but regardless you experience a hookup.  While girls have hopes for further time together or potentially extending the hookup into a casual or romantic relationship, guys tend to have the mantra of “one and done” leaving the girl with some unresponded texts and a wounded ego.  Yet, why can’t girls do the same thing to guys. Continue reading